Because sometimes it's not enough to tell yourself that you love you, but you have to show up physically for yourself too.
Four years ago when I attempted to commit suicide, I had no idea the direction my life was taking or what this was a sign for in my life. I was known as the girl with such a bright smile and thrived off optimism, but only I knew what I was battling inside. Four years ago I also began tapping into my purpose and passion and finally, I realized what it all was a sign for:
To bring a little pocketful of sunshine wherever I go.♡
Today, I want to share a few coping mechanisms that have ultimately saved my life from failed attempts of suicide and mental sabotage.
When Life gave me Lemons, I started wearing Yellow More.
Yellow to me is much more than a color, as it embodies a spirit that I wish to posses. Yellow reminds me of joy. But, more importantly, highlights the many different aspects of my persona.
I do not aim to wear the color yellow to stand out for attention, but rather to embrace and overpower the many dark roads I've traveled in my lifetime. Many like to hide their dark truths, but I choose to shed light on each and every one of them. I want my truths to stand out, because I want nothing but true and rather real energy to gravitate towards me.
I also choose to wear yellow because of it's boldness, bravery and vibrancy. For one, to wear yellow is taking a risk as it immediately captures the eyes around me. This attention forces me to constantly check in on myself and notice where my feet are planted (not literally).
I often tell myself, while others glance at my fit:
"Smile. You're aura is just as bright as your fit."
"Remember you are only as good as your last thought. THINK HAPPY THOUGHTS! Bih, you're wearing yellow, you have all rights given to THINK HAPPY THOUGHTS!"
A Bold Red Lip.
Because this year, everything I speak I hope to breed with love and clarity.
It's very important to understand that everything in which we speak, is coded back into our minds. When we tell ourselves things like:
"I don't think I can do this"
"She's better at that than I am."
We train our brains to believe that hearing negative words is a normalcy.
Nah, not at all. In order to elevate and radiate on a spiritual level, we must be gentle with the words we speak unto ourselves. Instead of saying "Sorry" all the damn time for an honest and human mistake, start saying "Thank you."
"Thank you for still choosing to hang out with me, even though I've been forgetting to respond to you."
Or, even tell yourself . . . "Thank you for saving me another heartbreak by not texting him back today."
It's the small things that can change our lives in such major ways. This is how you practice wellness. By understanding your flaws and faults, but you remain positive in your pursuits of trying to be a better person.♡
Always, Always and Always Slay your Baby Hairs.
Girl yes, I meant what I said.
If there's one thing I've learned about myself it's certainly that Representation Matters. Think about it, it's seldom we sleek and perfect our baby hairs to our liking on the first try. And so every morning that I take the time to sleek my edges, I am reminded that this is how everyday life works.
Sometimes you may need a higher ratio of edge control to water. And other days, you just might need a better damn brush.
Stick with me . . .
Some days we may need to vent and share our stories, where other days, we need to just listen and be observant. And truly, there are other times where we may need to just throw the whole day away and start over.
But what's key to remember here is that if you are choosing to take a step back to restart, or deciding to share your story, in these moments you are conditioning and polishing your mental and emotional well-being to show up for yourself and ultimately live your best life.
Some will say, "You are who you are regardless of your looks." But I believe that we have the power to be whatever we make our minds up to be. And if representing my 'Black Girl Joy' looks like wearing a Bold Red Lip, or perfecting my baby hairs every morning - Best believe I'm gone make it look sexy.
I want you to remember that Wellness for one does not look the same for all. We each come from different backgrounds and circumstances that enable us to value different things in life that grant us a peace of mind.
I also want you to remember that materialistic items will not grant you emotional or mental wellness, but it is the conditioning of your thoughts associated with these items. For example, if there was never another red lipstick made today, I can say that I've both written and spoken to myself long enough to know that no matter what I disclose, it will breed from love.
It is the practice that counts.
Some may not be able to afford a decked out all yellow wardrobe, but they can assuredly make their minds up and condition themselves to believe that who they are and who they choose to resemble will be that of yellow - in whatever way that looks for them.